My Foreign Cities by Elizabeth Scarboro

What if, as a teenager, you fell in love with a peer who was already facing their middle age years as well as dealing with declining health that would lead to eventual death at a relatively young age from a condition they were born with? That is what happened to Elizabeth Scarboro when she met Stephen, a young man with cystic fibrosis, in high school. Starting out as very close friends who become lovers and then spouses, Elizabeth and Stephen choose to face the uncertain and often bumpy road of his impending mortality by living life to the fullest together regardless of whatever the challenges may be. My Foreign Cities allows us to follow them on their journey. We feel as though they could be our friends, loved ones or even ourselves as they deal with both the usual challenges in life and the threat of impending death.

We feel as though they could be our friends, loved ones or even ourselves as they deal with both the usual challenges in life and the threat of impending death.

My Foreign Cities traces Scarboro’s journey with her husband by sharing vignettes in each chapter that act as snapshots for us into a life filled with lots of love and a thirst for living fully. These moments sustain them through the dark moments and challenges that come with cystic fibrosis. Scarboro shares both the sweet and humorous moments, and the difficult moments of her life with Stephen. All the while, she colors her narrative with her philosophical ponderings about her time spent with her beloved husband.

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During one of Stephen’s hospital stays, he ends up in a room on the cystic fibrosis floor where the previous occupant was an 80-year-old man who died of pneumonia. The man was only there because of the lack of overall beds in the hospital. Since this late man lived such a long life compared to the others living with cystic fibrosis on that floor, Scarboro reflects on a colloquialism she always heard. She “wondered whether it was true what they said about pneumonia being the old man’s friend. Did old men actually see it this way, or was it only younger, healthier people who thought the end of life wasn’t worth dragging out?” This philosophical musing demonstrates how a serious illness, such as cystic fibrosis, affecting someone you love deeply can make you rethink what certain phrases meant to comfort us about death and loss are actually about. These colloquialisms bring about a whole new meaning when impending death is expected for young adults  in love who are just figuring out their futures.

Her words, memories and ponderings trigger you into reflecting on your own life, raising questions like whether you are living each day to the fullest and what kinds of decisions you would make if you were faced with the same challenges the author must face.

My Foreign Cities serves as a beautiful reminder of how precious life is as a whole. Scarboro tells her readers that she “want[s] to give you post-hospital bliss. Because there’s nothing like it…It’s a cross between the feeling of falling in love and having narrowly escaped being hit by a car.” Scarboro’s writing style, including metaphors and word choice, grabbed me from the start and propelled me to keep reading to learn about her life with Stephen and her personal views about death and loss of a spouse from becoming a widow at a young age. Her words, memories and ponderings trigger you into reflecting on your own life,  raising questions like whether you are living each day to the fullest and what kinds of decisions you would make if you were faced with the same challenges the author must face.

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